Friday, May 11, 2012

Granite and Cell Phones

Dear John,

I've had another busy day. Went to the Post Office, then to the bank to report an email scam involving town internet addresses, the bank, and a trojan. Then to work for about 6 hours. Called Panera Benefits in St. Louis. Then to the monument company. Talked to your mother in their parking lot. Talked to Jen for almost 3 hours tonight. Now for the details:

I got another call from Goshen Hospital this morning - Anthem is still insisting you died in January. So I called Erin, faxed her a copy of your death certificate, and predict that there will be blood tonight. The hospital is being very patient with all of this. After all, their records agree that you were very much alive after January. But they are being much nicer than they have to, and I appreciate it. 

Your mother called after I left work this afternoon. I had sent her an arrangement of pink roses and carnations for Mother's Day - I asked them to deliver it today in case she's out with Jim and Irene tomorrow. The arrangement sounds just like the picture on FTD, which is unusual and gratifying. It is so good to talk to her now! I didn't send her a card; they don't make any Mother's Day cards that are appropriate to send to your mother-in-law right after your husband's death. In fact, I didn't find any that are from daughter-in-law to mother-in-law. Serious deficiency. 

I ordered our headstone today. I ended up going to Always in Stone; it's the only one in Goshen now, and they're used to working with Oak Ridge. I got a simple one - Hockman at the top, our names and dates on the right and left under it, and a budded cross between our names. We found the cross on Yahoo Images on the computer there. The stone is simple and beautiful. I had expected to have difficulty choosing the type of stone, but that was easy. Walking around outside looking at the headstones on display, I saw one with unpolished edges and knew it was gray granite. It looked just like the stone I grew up with - like Stone Mountain, Clingman's Dome, and all the rocks that stuck up out of the ground. Well, it is gray granite, and it is from North Georgia. So that's what we have. We'll end up under the stone I grew up climbing and skinning my knees on. And the edges will be unfinished - they will look just like granite right out of the ground. I'm in love with our headstone. I'd like to be under it with you in a week or so, but Jen has absolutely forbidden that. So I'll be patient, and just look at it for a while.

Jen called tonight, just to chat and catch up. We talked for about 3 hours - I know you can't imagine that - and had a wonderful time. I can't figure out the logistics, but I know that somehow she's really ours. I can't imagine life without her - it seems like we've always had her. I do love the child to death.

That's all the news - I suppose it's enough for one night! I love you so much, am so grateful for all the years I had with you, and am looking forward to being with you for all eternity. It's the time in between that's hard. But it's all worth it. I'll get there whenever Jen lets me!

Sleep well tonight,

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