The House Lives and Breathes Today

Dear John,

Had a wonderful day other than the fibro, and a better day after Vicodin. The house feels alive again with all of us living here. It was good to come home from work and receive human greetings along with the canine ones.

Jen and a friend took the van back to South Bend, and Elyssa and I had a good time playing, eating dinner, and playing some more. She and Jethro have discovered tug-of-war - they're about equal in weight, so advantage goes to the one standing on the rug. Yesterday I taught her about salad forks. Tonight at dinner we talked about symmetry - I went around the room pointing out things and letting her tell me if they were symmetrical or asymmetrical. She's so quick and bright and curious.

This evening after Elyssa was in bed, Jen and I had some time to just talk. I told her that I'd known for years that I loved her like our daughter. But I've also realized that she's one of my best friends. And that is good. A daughter is truly a wonderful thing. She's such a gift. I know it's been said before: God gave me a child in my old age to take away my disgrace among women. And even grandchildren, too!

The house really does feel alive again. It won't be settled for a while, and since children grow it will never be settled the way a house is for us older folks. But the growing is good and the unsettling is good. It's a living thing. Homeostasis doesn't mean stasis, and equilibrium doesn't mean immobility. It is good to have the four of us here - three women and a dog. This is right for all of us now. It is good.

Missing Grandpa, and Dad, and husband/best friend/everything in the world to me - oh, and the world's best human daddy! We all love you very much,

Joan.