Friday, November 30, 2012

That Crashing Sound is Me

Dear John,
 
Well, it's done. And it wasn't as bad as I feared. I felt like I used to at piano recitals. It seemed to be about determining what the limits of my memory are. And it is quite limited. The attorney seemed surprised that I have no memory at all from the time I went through downtown Topeka until the next day in ICU when Audora came in. He did believe me, though, which is good. I talked to him a bit after the formal deposition. I told him some of the history of the intersection. And I got to ask him to pass on how very sorry I am to have injured someone.
 
On the home front, Jen and Elyssa are in their new place tonight. The big furniture will go tomorrow when there are more people here. When Jethro figured out what was happening he looked so sad. I could hear Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz saying, "People come and go so quickly around here." But they're not going as far away as you did, so he'll be okay.
 
I'm about three steps beyond exhausted, so I'm off to bed. I was in full-stress mode today until the deposition was done. You know how it feels when the stress is over and you crash - that's where I am tonight.
 
Thank you for your prayers. It helps just to know how much confidence you had in me, and how certain you were that I'd be okay on my own. You've always known me better than I knew myself, so you're probably right. Now I'm just weary. I told Jen that I'm even too tired to dig - if I came to visit you tonight, I'd just lie down on my side of the plot and go to sleep. And it would be so nice to sleep there with you!
 
Love you so much,
Joan.

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