If You're Stuck with Something, You Might As Well Be at the Beach

Dear John,

 

Sunrise

It's been another lovely day. I slept in until 5:50 this time, then I walked west down the beach. We went shopping for a bit and worked a jigsaw puzzle. Later Irene and I took a walk down the beach.

 

She wore shoes and walked above the tide line, like a sensible person, while I went barefoot and walked in the water. I was surprised that the water was so warm. The sandpipers were following the waves and eating the little crustaceans behind them. I stood there for a bit and watched the sand. It's wonderful to watch these tiny creatures turn around in the sand, looking for which way is down, then dig really fast and disappear. I can remember Mama showing me that when I was little. She'd always say, "Come and look at how God made this."

 

Being here is making me want to go back to Key West. There were always things I wanted to do there that you weren't interested in. I'd like to be there for sunset, and there are house tours that I'd like to take. I just want to walk it, to wander the streets and look at the houses and gardens. I'd like to spend a week on Key West, maybe even fly in and out of there. I've driven the Overseas Highway plenty of times.

 

It surprised me to find myself thinking about that. I never expected to want to do things like that now that you're not here. I'm beginning to think differently about the future. I'm finding myself wanting to do things. Maybe that's part of passing the 18-month mark. Maybe it's just being here at the beach. Or maybe I'm just doing what you want me to. I still have bad times and always will - I had one tonight watching the sun go down. But I feel your presence and prayers and support, and I thank you for that. In everything I do for the rest of my life, I'd rather you were with me. But I'm here and you're there, and I'm stuck with that. If you're stuck with something, you might as well be at the beach.

 

Love you, with sand between my toes,

Joan.