The Nighttime Bathroom Protocol

Dear John,

 

I began turning the corner early this morning. I don't feel a lot better, but I'm breathing about half-normal now. And that is a great relief. I was still up a couple of times coughing last night, but I wasn't concerned about needing the ER. I'm getting better. At noon I actually

got out of bed, took a shower, and emptied the litter boxes. I'm officially unstoppable now.

 

I found this tonight and had to show it to you. This is exactly what happens around here. When I wake up during the night and need to go to the bathroom, the first thing I have to do is figure out who is where so I don't hurt anybody. Hunter is usually spread out across my ribs, Abby in the middle of your side of the bed, Jethro where your feet would be, and Maggie curled up either behind my knees or at the small of my back. When I move, they all shift so I can get up, and sometimes they all come to the bathroom with me. When I come back to bed, I have to be sure nobody is lying in my spot so I don't lie down on anybody. I move whoever needs moving, lie down, and they all come and array themselves in their former positions.

 

See what you're missing? You could have cats sleeping on you, too. Or maybe you do - all the animals are in Heaven. Maybe you get to cuddle with lions and sleep with elephants. How wonderful would that be! I can't imagine living and worshipping with all the animals who have ever lived. Was Baron waiting for you when you got there, and Naomi and Caleb right behind him? I can't wait to see all of you again.

 

But right now, my little family is here and it needs me. And it's bedtime for all of us. I just took cough syrup, so I will soon be even more incoherent than usual. I believe I will herd the cats and get us all in bed. If you can come and join us, we'll be happy to make room for Daddy!

 

Miss you,

Joan.