Friday, May 29, 2015

A Pastor, a Priest, a Rabbi, & an Oxford Comma

Dear John,
I found this and knew you'd love it. You always loved
"walked into a bar" jokes. Well, here's a literal interpretation of it. Enjoy!
You collected those jokes all your life. And you liked the NCIS episode, "A Man Walks into a Bar." You got the riddle immediately. I didn't. You were quicker with that kind of thing than I am.
I loved to watch your mind work. It intimidated me in the beginning, especially your memory. When we did Bible studies together when we were first married, I felt so threatened by the fact that you knew every verse from the reference. And you were confronted with the fact that somebody you considered intelligent didn't have your kind of memory. We both learned that we were good at different things - not better/worse or smarter/dumber, just different. It was good for both of us.
We always were good for both of us. I needed safety and unconditional love, and you gave me that in abundance. You needed emotional warmth, and I was a roaring fire for you to sit by. We were well-paired intellectually, too, and both had dark, sick, surreal senses of humor. We loved word play and mental gymnastics. We enjoyed so many of the same things.
But mostly, we just loved each other - loved beyond reason and beyond life. And so all of this is also in the present tense. I'm still me, you're still you, and none of this has changed. We're just apart for a while. So I'm sending this joke to you because I know how much you'll like it. You'll notice that the caption omits the Oxford comma. I cringe, but have to show it to you anyway. You'll get my Oxford comma when you pry it from my dead, cold hand. And as I say that, I can see the grin on your face. Keep smiling - you know how important that comma is.
It's time for me to get everybody to bed. It's almost 10:00 and I'm working tomorrow. We love you and miss you. A wife, a dog, and three cats miss you very much.
Love you forever,

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